Do you have “good girl syndrome”?

Good girl gone mad.
Here’s a health quiz: Do you put everyone else’s needs above your own? Do you have a hard time saying the word “no”? Do you live in fear of people being mad at you?
And do you also have a tummy ache?
If so, you might just have “good girl syndrome” — so says Diane Lange, a therapist and “positive living expert” whose most recent book, “Worthy,” seeks to help women break free of feelings of unworthiness and people-pleasing patterns.
Good girl syndrome isn’t just in your head — it can also make you physically ill.
“Many women have [good girl syndrome],” Lange told The Post.
“Many of us were raised to be the nurturer, to be quiet and make sure everybody else is happy. It’s a learned trait. Men can be people pleasers but it’s mostly women that I see who deal with being a people pleaser because of the way we are raised.”
A former people-pleaser herself, Lange is familiar with the psychological symptoms of good girl syndrome, which include having no boundaries, fear of conflict and self-expression, “perfectionism and always putting everyone in front of you [because] they are more important than you are.”
But not everyone is aware that this exhausting and anxiety-inducing behavior also takes a physical toll in the form of “the same symptoms as stress — stomach issues, headaches, affects your sleep, can cause appetite changes,” she said.
If you think you or someone you love has good girl syndrome, the good news is, there’s a cure.
The first step, according to Lange, is admitting that you have it by “being self-aware of your behaviors.”

“Learn about boundaries and start setting them, which includes learning to say no and having self-care,” she advised.
Next, she recommends slowly taking “baby steps of doing self-care — it could be as simple as going to bed earlier, eating foods that are good for you and taking a walk. Add some mindfulness into your routine to help destress and become self-aware.”
Her personal self-care favorite? Journaling.
“I love doing the morning ‘brain dump’ where you write in a journal every morning,” she said. “You write whatever is on your mind, released on paper. No judgment or spell check.”
It may be necessary — but that doesn’t mean you can expect it to be easy.
“Make the commitment to change your behaviors but remember it will be scary,” she said. “Change is scary. You changing and saying no and having boundaries will affect others around you so be prepared for people to get upset or for the relationship to change. That is a sign you are doing the work. ”
Recovery can be painful — but the freedom at the other end makes it all worthwhile.